Ignorance is Bliss
by JustTeahPlease
Summary: No one had known a problem quite like this would arise. Of course the Son of Satan would be every demon-girl's dream come true. But Yukio will give everything so Rin remained ignorant, everything to keep him away from those banshees, those... fangirls.


_Alright, so this was inspired by one pic I saw on dA, with Rin being surrounded by demon-girls vying for his attention. I'm surprised I didn't think of it before, it's so obvious! Rin may not be popular with girls in Assiah, but what about Gehenna?_

_And so a new problem arises for the Exorcists. And poor Yukio, who knows that kind of trouble from personal experience and would do anything to protect his little (older) brother from those... horrible monsters._

_Anyway, enjoy! :D_

_Disclaimer: I don't own Ao no/Blue Exorcist.  
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><p><strong>Title:<strong> Ignorance is Bliss  
><strong>Genre:<strong> General/Humor  
><strong>Pairings:<strong> None  
><strong>Rating:<strong> K  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> None  
><strong>Words: <strong>2664

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><p>He was just about to put the final touches to his History essay when his phone went off. However, it was not the usual beep signifying a mission. It had a more bell-like quality to it, almost like a woman's laughter.<p>

Yukio froze.

From the other side of the room, Rin looked up from the manga he'd been reading on the bed. His brother was sitting all stiff in his chair, the cell-phone appearing ignored at his side.

"Yukio? Hey Yukio, is it a mission?"

The voice broke Yukio from whatever his train of thought had been. He blinked at his brother, then tensed again as the phone continued to ring. Quickly standing up, he moved to his exorcist uniform and weapon holster that was draped over a chair, beginning to put them on quickly and efficiently.

"Yu-ki-oooo! Is it one?" Rin whined. He didn't like his brother ignoring him.

"What- oh, yeah." Yukio said distractedly, checking his weapons were loaded.

Rin's face lit up. "Really?" He jumped off the bed, tail waving madly behind him. "Hey, can I come with you then? Can I? _Can I_?"

He was almost bouncing on his heels in excitement, but the wide shocked eyes suddenly directed his way made him falter a bit. His brother looked at him with an unfathomable expression. He would have called it terrified and filled with horror, but Yukio wouldn't act like that.

He wouldn't… right?

"Come with me?" Yukio whispered in a voice so small Rin had to strain his ears to hear it. Before he could comment on it though, the younger of the two composed himself and shook his head vehemently. He leveled Rin with hard eyes that allowed no dispute. "No Niisan, you cannot."

"What! Why?" Rin shouted, outraged. "I helped you last time! If you bring me again we might get another friend like Kuro! Won't that be much better than just killing them off?"

But Yukio just shook his head through all of Rin's speech. Dressed in uniform and ready to set out, he moved back to the desk where the cell-phone was still ringing.

"No, Brother. Believe me when I say that this is not one of those missions," he picked up the phone and headed for the door, but stopped and turned around to regard his brother with eyes so serious the other did a small double-take. "You _cannot_ go, Niisan. Not this time."

There was a short silence between the two, only broken when the phone rung again.

"Promise me Niisan. Please promise you won't go."

Rin gulped, trying to hold his ground, but something in his brother's expression spoke of… _things_. Things so terrifying that Rin's involvement would make them only more terrifying. Whatever it was, it was serious.

And Yukio had said 'please'. What else could he do but give in?

"Fine, I promise. I won't go."

And he wouldn't, just to keep his brother happy. By now, he wasn't sure he even wanted to know what this mysterious 'mission' actually was.

"Good." Yukio said. And he was gone.

Outside of the old dorm building, he finally snapped the ringing phone open and took the call.

"Where?" were his first words.

"At the North-East corner, just outside the gates!" The answer was prompt. "We need some back-up, there's at least four of them this time!"

"I'm coming, I'm just by the west side now."

"What took you so long, Yukio? You know how vicious they can get if they're not dealt with quickly!"

"I'm sorry Shura-san, but I had to make sure Niisan wouldn't go with me."

There was a stunned silence on the other side, then some cursing as signs of battle were heard in the background. Yukio picked up his pace.

"He wanted _what_- Shit, did you make sure he didn't follow behind? We can't let him know of this, it's top priority-"

"Yes, I know! And I made sure he wouldn't follow, so it's safe." He grunted as he ran, already seeing some flashing lights in the distance. "I'm almost there."

He hung up, stuffing the phone in his pocket before bringing out his other gun, now fully armed.

He knew full well why his brother couldn't find out about this. No one knew how he would react. Not Yukio, Shura, not Mephisto, not even the Vatican itself. Although many had their theories and suspicions, no one wanted to risk and find out Rin's reaction. He just couldn't discover this. Not until he was twenty at least.

The reason?

Teenage hormones.

A shrill female shriek pierced the air, making Yukio want to cover his ears in despair. However, they were busy holding his guns and searching for the source of the sound. He could see flashes of light around the corner of a building, so he assumed the others were gathered there. It appeared that one of their targets had escaped.

A movement to his left had him shooting in that direction, but the person moved out of the way just in time. She rolled on the ground, avoiding the bullets, then when the barrage stopped she slowly got back up.

She might have been a thing of beauty once, but with the demon currently possessing her it was questionable at best. The tail and cat ears might have been cute, but the tufts of purple fur randomly growing on her body negated that. The Coaltar flocking around her like flies to a corpse also weren't helping.

"Exorcist, out of my way!" she shouted before attacking.

Yukio calmly dodged out of the way of her sharp claws and sent a few bullets her way. She was fast, but was grazed with two nonetheless.

"Sorry, but I can't do that," he replied, not feeling sorry at all.

"Aaah!" she shrieked, and Yukio was momentarily surprised at her sudden increase in speed. He barely dodged her claws. "I said let me to him! Give him to me!"

He put some distance between them with a few conveniently placed bullets, then resumed the conversation.

"Why would you think I would do that? And what about those others?" he cocked his head to indicate the ongoing fight with the rest of the invading demons.

The girl just laughed, spit coming out of her mouth with the action. Yukio grimaced at the sight. "They're not worthy his time. Only I am! Only I am worthy of Rin-sama's attention!"

Her laugh turned so high it hurt the exorcist's ear. He always forgot how obsessed these creatures could get.

As Rin's brother, it was Yukio's duty to protect him from these… beasts. But no, even that term appeared too good for such lowly creatures. He dearly hoped his brother would never have to meet one of these. EVER.

He'd make sure of that.

"And why do you think he would prefer you over the others? You don't really strike me as someone whose appearance he would be attracted to."

The girl let out an enraged yell and renewed her attempts to turn him into shish-kebab. Yukio found it increasingly hard to deflect her attacks. Maybe he shouldn't have insulted her chances with his brother, it always got them even madder and strangely gave boost to their abilities.

But does he ever listen? Of course not.

Not when it was his brother they were after.

"Shut up! This container is weak, but in Gehenna I'll show him my real beauty! He will have eyes only for me and no one lese! Now out of my way!" Another swipe of claws. "And what would you know about Rin-sama's taste anyway, you pathetic piece of exorcist meat?"

Barely flinching at the slash that shredded his sleeve and tore at the skin, Yukio swiftly re-loaded his gun and fired. He felt more than a bit of satisfaction as it hit, making the girl grab her arm with a pained shriek.

Oh, now she was really angry. But she was injured and he just needed some form of distraction to finish her off.

His eyes caught two exorcists cornering another female demon in the distance. Inwardly he smirked.

"Me? I'm no one special, but as Rin-sama's brother, I do believe I know about his taste more than you. And according to his taste, that female is much more preferable."

Hook, line, and sinker. The girl immediately looked away, ready to fight whoever thought they had better chances with her Rin-sama. She didn't even notice the bullets sent her way until she was a screaming mess of black smoke. A moment later, only a normal unconscious teenage girl was left behind.

Yukio sighed heavily, slumping his shoulders and falling to the ground. From there he could already see that the others were finishing up. He caught sight of some of their targets and grimaced. One of them had spider legs protruding from her back, another one had large bull horns and nostrils, and yet another one was wielding a lizard tail and a long tongue reminiscent of a frog. Looking at them, he realized his opponent had been the prettiest one out of the bunch.

And he'd had to restrain himself from running for the hills just because of her looks.

He shuddered. How it had come to this he would never figure out.

No one had known a problem quite like this would arise. In the beginning, when Rin had just released his flames for the first time, they didn't think they'd have to worry about anything other than keeping it under wraps and the few demons that wanted to kill/play/take him back to Gehenna to Satan.

He supposed it should have been expected, as no doubt the whole of Gehenna had soon became aware that _indeed_, there _was_ a Son of Satan and he _was_ very much alive, very much in Assiah, very much possessing the blue flames and _very much_ not bad-looking.

No one knew how that last bit of information came out, but privately fingers were pointed at Amaimon and Mephisto, though no one could prove anything.

After that, things just went downhill. The first time they fought one of those… creatures, they were more bewildered than anything, but as more and more had began to come, they saw this would very quickly become a regular occurrence.

He dragged a hand through his hair. No, he couldn't keep calling them various names. He should just call them for what they were, but it still gave him shudders to think of the extents of their obsession. They may be beasts, they may be demons, they may even be sorry excuses of their very existence, Assiah or Gehenna wise, but first and foremost… they were _fangirls_.

He shuddered again, and it had nothing to do with the cold night.

After the Vatican found out about Rin, it was a blessing in disguise. After much discussion they had brought the subject up with them. At first they hadn't believed, but upon witnessing their vicious nature themselves, a bunch of exorcists had suddenly been administered the task of helping keep these demons away at all times.

Some very brave souls might have even said that the Vatican had felt _sorry_ for the Son of Satan (who wouldn't in such a situation?), but a few glares sent their ways quickly shushed them up.

"You okay?"

He looked up to see a slightly irritated Shura approaching his way. She plopped down next to him, then laid on her back and groaned pathetically.

"Hard night?" he asked, already knowing what might have transpired to raise her ire.

"Hah, hard night! I swear, _every _DAMN time they think I'm some fangirl who has a crush on the brat and wants him all to herself. Every,_ every_ time they flock just around me to make sure 'the bitch knows her place'. Lunatics!"

Yukio 'hmm'-ed. By now, he knew that speech to heart. He'd heard it more times than he cared about, but really, it was all Shura's own fault. She shouldn't have pretended to be Rin's girlfriend that once just to piss the demons off. Word spread fast in Gehenna it seemed.

Having finished her rant, Shura sat up and glanced at the unconscious girl a few feet away. From her position it was easy to deduce what must have happened. She snorted.

Yukio raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"

"Oh nothing." She plopped back down. "You played that 'my brother likes her better' act again, right?"

He just gave a shrug. "It worked."

"True." It always did.

They waited until the others were done with the clean-up, then slowly proceeded back to the school grounds. Soon they parted, only Shura staying by his side since she had nothing better to do.

Privately, Yukio didn't see why they shouldn't tell Rin about this… Actually no, he _did_ see why not. _He_ sure didn't want Rin to know. God help him but he'd _never_ want his brother exposed to this atrocity. No one deserved to be the victim of those monsters.

He didn't see why the _Vatican_ had forbidden it though. It wasn't like Rin would suddenly change sides if he found out about it. Yukio knew his brother was, just like any other teenager, currently interested in the other sex and would gladly get a date, but surely he wouldn't go as far as to engage with those demons?

He thought back on how those girls looked like, how sharp their nails were and their voices high enough to make your ears bleed in agony. A shudder wracked through him.

Surely not.

But then again, the Vatican always had that one argument that overrode all others, that one and only fact that negated all other opinions on the matter. No one could dispute it, _everyone_ knew it was true, and _everyone_ could say it was a valid reason. Even Yukio.

Rin was a demon, yes. But first and foremost, he was a teenager. With teenage hormones.

And that was dangerous, because in everyone's eyes, there was always that tiny, little, barely there miniscule chance that he might, well, come to like those, those… fangirls.

He grimaced at the mental image.

Shura saw the expression, but took its meaning for something entirely else. She patted him on the back reassuringly.

"Don't worry, I won't make fun of you this time since I'm too exhausted. Instead, I'll wait till tomorrow so I'm all rested and ready to go!" she gave him a cheeky grin.

Yukio just sighed.

Besides cutting into his study time, pulling him away in the middle of the night and having him make sure that Rin never found out, this 'fangirl' business had another downfall too.

It sure didn't help that every one of those possessed girls, at some point in time had been (or still is)… _his_ fangirl.

The Okumura twins just never get their peace, do they?

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><p><strong>OMAKE:<strong>

"Yukio! YUKIO YOU BASTARD, I'M GONNA KILL YOU!"

Okay, so Rin understood Yukio was a bit wary of him not listening and following him secretly. He would have liked for his younger brother to trust him a bit more, but then again he knew it was only fair as Rin would have usually gone after him anyway.

This time he didn't though. He'd seen something in his brother's eyes, and he knew he didn't want to find out what it was.

He would have also understood Yukio sealing the building so he couldn't leave. He would have been pissed, he would have yelled at him when he came home, but in the end it would have been okay.

But then… what in the world possessed Yukio to seal him off in just their sleeping quarters? Was he in such a hurry that he didn't notice at all?

Whatever it was, it wouldn't placate Rin. No excuse would be good enough.

Because Rin was pissed. Because he was hungry. Because he needed to take a piss.

Right. Now.

"YUUKIIIOOO!"

His brother was so dead.

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><p><em>Yukio, you're a dead man walking! D:<br>(Teenage hormones, teehee xD)  
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_Review!_


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